Interesting post by Amy Gray called “Raising girls as victims,” in which Gray says, “We create the expectation that girls (but not boys) are fragile and in need of defending.”
I’ve been thinking a lot about fear lately, and this feels true in my experience. Growing up, it seemed like I was warned about everything.
She describes what she wants for her daughter:
I want my daughter to experiment with her boundaries and learn how to refine on her own terms: I want her to dye her hair ridiculous colours, wear clothes so stupid they deserve a parody Tumblr and have all the make-up application skills of Picasso after a nasty bender. I want her to fall over, let her be more artifice than actual – for a brief moment just let her play and see what she wants, how she wants to determine herself through a process of trial and error. I want her to say ludicrous things until she finds her internal mast. I also want her to go out and shag and not have to make it “mean” something or find someone amazing and have it mean everything.
How does that match your childhood? Were you encouraged to try anything, or sheltered from the world?